The Five Love Languages: Quality Time
Is there anything of more value than your time?
This past week we’ve had some excitement at our house. My youngest daughter is in Kindergarten. Last week they were watching chicken eggs in their classroom that were about ready to hatch.
Every day Emma would come home with a report with how the eggs were doing.
But, it’s 2017.
So not only did we get a daily report from Emma on how the eggs were doing & if there were any chicks walking around… her teacher decided to LiveStream the eggs.
Every day after school & in the mornings before school our whole family was gathered around a screen watching this.
Talk about spending quality time together.
How many of you like to wait? How many of you just love unproductive time?
That’s what I thought.
Not many of us like waiting & when you’re waiting on baby chicks to hatch & your watching a live stream of eggs, its kind of like watching paint dry.
But then it happened… One at a time they began to break through the shells & walk around.
Our Obsession with Time
I believe we live in a world that has never been more obsessed with time. We try to squeeze as much as possible into every day. We schedule & calendar out every moment of every day. We love productivity apps, time saving apps, & apps that improve our work flow so we can get more done in less time.
You would think that because we can get more done in less time that we would have more free time. You would think that wold create shorter work days & more time with our friends & families. But somehow, even though we can do more faster than ever before, we have less time.
I think we need to get back to the idea of quality time with people.
Being together time & time again over time has given you a depth of relationship that you just can’t get any other way… & this is important for us to realize. In our world of quick fixes & productivity apps that allow us to accomplish more in less time, there is no substitute in relationships for quality, unproductive time with people.
[Tweet “There is no substitute in relationships for quality, unproductive time with people. #qualitytime”]What does it look like to honor God with our time?
Is God concerned with us doing more? Or is He concerned with something else when it comes to how we use our time?
There is an amazing story in Mark 5.1-20 about a man who Jesus healed, a man no one else had time for, a man whose life was totally & radically changed because of Jesus. Here’s what happened…
Jesus & his disciples encountered a man who Mark says was possessed by demons.
Two Points about Jesus & Time
Before we go any further, I think it’s important to note two things.
First, if Jesus took time to be with people, especially people that no one else had time for… should we maybe free up some time in our schedules for people too?
Jesus, just taking time to be present with this man, spoke of his love for him LONG before he could speak of His love to him.
And our presence with people speaks of our love for them long before we ever have the chance to express our words of love to them.
[Tweet “Our presence with people speaks of our love long before we have the chance to speak.”]Second, I think it’s important to realize that some of us think that because of what we’ve have done or because of what has been done to us (like this man) that Jesus doesn’t have time for you. We think that because of that Jesus doesn’t want to “waste any time” on us.
But this story is a reminder that there is nothing you could ever do or nothing that cold ever be done to you that would make God love you less.
[Tweet “There is nothing that cold ever make God love you less.”]What Do You Do When Jesus Completely Changes Your Life?
Jesus heals this man of his demon possession, literally sets him free from the hell he was living in every day. In fact, Mark says this to demonstrate how completely & radically this man was after his encounter with Jesus…
A crowd soon gathered around Jesus, and they saw the man who had been possessed by the legion of demons. He was sitting there fully clothed and perfectly sane, and they were all afraid. Mark 5.15
The change was unbelievable. So you can understand that this man, because of what Jesus had done for him, wanted to follow Jesus.
As Jesus was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon possessed begged to go with him. Mark 5.18
Now, you might expect Jesus to tell this man… now that you’re free, now that you’ve been healed, now that your life has been completely changed… I need you to write & publish a best selling book about your experience. I need you to travel the world & speak, go on morning shows & talk about what I’ve done for you. I need you to create a platform & spread the message. I need you to build an email list, create a brand, really market this & help me get the word out about the Kingdom of God. I need you to start a blog & get a big following on social media.
Or you might think Jesus would say these words, “Come follow me.” He’s said those words before to others. I need you to come on the road with me & as I travel from town to town, from place to place, I need you to tell this story, to tell others what I’ve done for you. I need you to join my ministry team. Become one of my traveling disciples. I need you to head up this part of my ministry… you’re going to be in charge of my “Healing People of Demon Possession” division. It’s going to be a lot of work & you’re going to be busy, but you understand how important this work is.
This man experienced something AMAZING. You might expect Jesus to tell this man to do a hundred different things now that His life has radically been changed by God.
But Jesus didn’t say any of that.
But Jesus said, “No, go home to your family, and tell them everything the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been.” Mark 5.19
In other words, now that I’ve taken time to be with you, help you, heal you… go home & take time with the people who matter most to you, people who have missed out on being with you for all these years because of your condition, people who love you & be with them. And while you’re taking time to be with them, tell them what God has done for you.
Here’s what you can do, spend time with the people that matter most & tell them what God has done for you.
And it makes me think, maybe the most loving thing we can do is to give someone our uninterrupted, undivided attention & tell them what God has done for us.
[Tweet “Maybe the most loving thing we can do is to give someone our uninterrupted, undivided attention.”]Your Time Matters
It may be that in a world consumed with productivity & getting more done, that maybe we as followers of Jesus should adopt a policy of making the investment of quality time in people for the glory of God.
You can say the words I love you over & over again, but if you don’t give someone your time, those words carry no weight.
Because quality time over time in a world of constant distraction speaks love louder than words. Just ask anyone who has spent time with Jesus.
[Tweet “Quality time over time in a world of constant distraction speaks love louder than words.”]
